The content of this piece was written during a viewing of the first episode of Tenchi Muyo: Mihoshi Special on September 27, 2010. Edits have been made for spelling and grammar, but the rest is completely untouched, and un-edited from its original format.

If you ever wondered what bad fan-fiction would be like if it were animated, look no further. If you enjoy this, then I wonder if your heart is as black as the pits of Hell, where demons prowl and souls are rended bare. I’m clearly exaggerating, but it’s that bad. Please, do yourself a favor and spare yourself the punishment.

9:26 PM:Good evening, everybody. Tonight kicks off AIC Week with a look at one of AIC’s best-known shows: Tenchi Universe.

9:26 PM:While not as good as its OVA fore-runner, the show still has a lot of charm and character.

9:26 PM:As always, I’d like to open with some basic information:

9:26 PM:Directed by Hiroshi Negishi (Saber Marionette J, Master of Mosquiton)

9:26 PM:Character Designs by Hiroshi Negishi (Tenchi Muyo in Love, Yoshimune)

9:26 PM:Animated by AIC (natch)

9:26 PM:Originally released by Pioneer Animation (later, Geneon)

9:30 PM:And it’s about 9:30 so… actually, just a moment. :) I just found something awesome, here

9:31 PM:This is one I need to share with the trinity accounts.

9:31 PM:In lieu of Tenchi Universe, I just found a copy of Magical Girl Pretty Sammy. There’s going to be a substitute tonight!

9:34 PM:Now where was I?

9:34 PM:Oh yes. Magical Girl Pretty Sammy.

9:35 PM:I’ve heard that this is godawful, so we’re in for a treat tonight!

9:36 PM:But before I begin, the essentials:

9:36 PM:Directed by Kazuyuki Hirokawa (Galactic Patrol Lensman, Tattoon Master)

9:37 PM:Character designs by Yoshitaka Kohno (Magical Canan, Mozu no Nie)

9:37 PM:Animated by AIC.

9:38 PM:Anyway, I’ve eaten enough time, so may god have mercy on us all.

9:39 PM:I’m going in

9:39 PM:Title screen! “Tenchi muyo” – wow… anticlimactic

9:40 PM:Ryo-Ohki :D Being chased… by Mihoshi? With some pseudo-brainless song?

9:40 PM:Wat… Ryoko with a bunch of midgets? I don’t WANNA know o_o

9:41 PM:Ouch! Mihoshi, being the ditz she is, jumps right on her. O_o That’s gotta hurt.

9:41 PM:…Sasami’s Red Riding Hood? wat

9:42 PM:And I guess Mihoshi’s Alice.. and chowing down on Ayeka (evil witch?)’s apples. wtf

9:43 PM:And apparently, Mihoshi had enough poison to drop Elvis but she’s still running around. Seriously, wtf. This better be a dream or drug trip.

9:43 PM:Dead Ayeka is go… and mochi house :D

9:43 PM:House is gon’ get eaten

9:44 PM:And I called it. Predictable is predictable.

9:44 PM:…well, that explains things. This is the Mihoshi Special.

9:44 PM:Guess what! DOUBLE SURPRISE! :D

9:44 PM:Or something

9:45 PM:Ohp… Dream… AND fever dream it is.

9:45 PM:Hah :D “It’s the old witch! D:” Ayeka’s gonna kill her

9:46 PM:And now Ayeka’s going on about how useless she is. >_> Can’t argue there.

9:46 PM:Ryoko’s got a Game Boy. Old school.

9:46 PM:I swear, when Mihoshi talks, I want to hurt her.

9:47 PM:Nothing against her, she just annoys the crap out of me.

9:47 PM:And now she’s caught lying. Badly, at that. Fun.

9:47 PM:Blah blah space pirate stealing energy matter.

9:48 PM:I hope this leads to some Kiyone action – She makes Mihoshi worth enduring.

9:49 PM:“The pirate was… well, let’s say it was Ryoko for now :3”

9:49 PM:No objections

9:49 PM:Cyberpunk Ryoko = win

9:49 PM:“What is ultra energy-matter? T_T” “It’s ultra energy matter! ^_^” …Plutonium?

9:49 PM:Go go Space cop Tenchi!

9:50 PM:“That day, I headed to my office with complete composure :3′ “AAAH! I’M LATE :O” bad liar is bad

9:50 PM:And she’s crying. -_- Oh jeez

9:50 PM:Yay Kiyone :D

9:51 PM:“My life was absolutely perfect until I became a detective, but since I was partnered with you, it became a nightmare! T_T” I feel ya. T_T

9:51 PM:Yay, Kiyone bitching out Mihoshi :D

9:51 PM:This is like fan fiction :D

9:51 PM:Only worse ’cause it’s animated :D

9:52 PM:WTF is Ayeka doing here?

9:52 PM:“This bubblehead here is my partner Mihoshi.” I love how Kiyone just verbally berates her at every chance.

9:53 PM:“You must be Ryoko, huh? :D” … … … riiiiight

9:53 PM:And Sasami’s a waitress now? wat.

9:53 PM:Apparently, she’s an “apprentice detective”

9:53 PM:

9:53 PM:This is pretty fucking bad.

9:54 PM:Kiyone makes it worth watching at this point. “YOU ARE MY STAR OF HOPE, MIHOSHI!” god this is bad. #facepalm

9:54 PM:I’d have rather paid for Oujisama no Oyobi at this point

9:55 PM:And apparently, Mihoshi fails at storytelling. “THAT RYOKO BANG BANG BANG THUD THUD SQUEEZE SQUEEZE!” … is this action or sex? ‘_’

9:55 PM:If it’s the latter, they’re REALLY doing it wrong

9:56 PM:“What hardships were there? T_T” “Let’s skip that :D”

9:56 PM:Apparently, Mihoshi’s using Sasami for child labor. :D

9:57 PM:“Anyone should see that Tenchi is Ayeka’s last chance to get married! Why can’t you understand the old maid’s feeling?”

9:57 PM:Hah. :D Have to admit that was a good one from Mihoshi. Cruel as sin, but shockingly witty

9:57 PM:And Ayeka broke her out of the story to kick some ass.

9:58 PM:They clearly know she’s bullshitting.

9:59 PM:Back to the story – they’re at Ryoko’s uh… shed?

9:59 PM:And fighting in the vacuum of space with no suits

9:59 PM:Mihoshi’s stupid enough to ring the bell -_- -groan-

9:59 PM:And Ryoko’s getting Tenchi drunk? sounds about right

9:59 PM:Here comes the rape

10:00 PM:“Don’t add to the crimes you’ve committed! :O” And Ayeka breaks up the rape. I foresee a catfight

10:00 PM:Welp… there goes the kotatsu

10:00 PM:And the lights

10:00 PM:Catfight is go. Not even Kiyone’s getting near THAT psychobitch

10:01 PM:Ryoko’s a Nintendo fan – Super Famicom spotted :D

10:01 PM:Washuu = mastermind… fun.


10:02 PM:Back to reality. Washuu = cooking fail

10:03 PM:“You really are a kind-hearted person, Ryoko :3” … and Ryoko’s cryin


10:04 PM:Ryoko = smart, Mihoshi = retarded

10:04 PM:Ayeka = pissed… and Sasami’s taking care of poor Kiyone. I really pity her

10:05 PM:In reality, they keep calling Mihoshi’s bullshit

10:06 PM:Finally, at DOKUTAA UUASHUU

10:06 PM:Who made a… huge moai head?

10:06 PM:And here comes the rape from Ryoko

10:07 PM:Correction: Moai head with GIANT FUCKING HAMMERS

10:07 PM:And now wat? ‘_’ Ryo-Ohki’s TALKING?

10:08 PM:“PURITII SAMII DA! :D” Hey, we DO get a taste of the suck!

10:08 PM:Cheesy 1990s henshin GO!

10:09 PM:Right down to underage naughty bits. WTF Japan

10:09 PM:Back to the rape.

10:09 PM:Oh come on! We could have salvaged the show with that! Somehow!

10:10 PM:Kiyone = awesome :D Trapped Washuu in a paradox.

10:10 PM:“If the universe doesn’t exist, you won’t exist :D” and… that pissed her off

10:10 PM:Ohp… Magical girl to save the day.

10:10 PM:“Just a magician who happened to stop by :D” oh god this is bad

10:11 PM:“Isn’t it too convenient?!” very.

10:11 PM:Yay – army of rapist chibi Ryokos all focused on Tenchi. This is turning into bad fanfic after all!

10:12 PM:Kiyone’s dead. Palpatine style.

10:13 PM:“You sacrificed yourself to save us ;-;” …she shares an apartment with her in the city.

10:14 PM:“I’ll never forget your sacrifice <3” Meanwhile… Kiyone’s lost in space and ready to murder. And YAY! CREDITS! :D

10:14 PM:Dear GOD this sucked. Seriously – I have to see how bad Pretty Sammy is now.