What Is It?

Jewel BEM Hunter Lime is a three-episode OVA based on the PC game of the same name. The show was produced by Ashi Productions (Knights of Ramune, Vampire Hunter D) and features character designs by Atsuko Nakajima (Ranma 1/2, Magic Knight Rayearth, You’re Under Arrest!).

The series begins in a world of spells and sorcery, where magical beings live just beyond the reach of our planet. In this mysterious land, a door to our realm exists, though it only opens on the night of the crescent moon.

Total Chekhov’s Gun, isn’t it?

Anyway, one night, sassy spell caster Lime and her companion Bass are in hot pursuit of a demon that’s stolen six Magic Spheres. The demon makes a get-away to the human realm, though it’s short-lived, as Bass takes him out with a well-timed strike. The demon plummets to his death, as the box containing the Magic Spheres bursts open and scatters the orbs across the city below. Obviously, this is a bad thing as the Magic Spheres are a threat to the balance of the universe.

Surprise! What? You expected this? Oh. Er… good.

The spheres are much like spiritual magnets, as they absorb the negativity and sadness of the world around them. This will eventually cause the orbs to manifest as the embodiments of the wrongdoings of the universe. Obviously, it’s up to Lime to retrieve the Magic Spheres before the human realm falls into oblivion. To do so, she’ll need wits, cunning, an air-headed sidekick, and a gaggle of powers that rip off Cutey Honey in the worst ways possible.

No, really. What the hell is it?

Jewel BEM Hunter Lime is one of those obscure OVAs that’s really nothing more than an extended commercial for the source material. In this case, the series is based on a series of PC games of the same name.

The series followed a “monster of the week” format, in which Lime and Bass dealt with a new embodiment of a Magic Sphere in each episode:

Episode 1’s baddie was “Mr. Candle,” a candle who vented his frustrations with redundancy by turning his victims to wax.
Episode 2 saw Lime and Bass face off against “Pursey” (Get it? Because he’s a purse! Haha… ha… shoot me) , a coin purse who was supposed to lash out against credit card users, but instead turned to stealing panties from high school girls. Somehow, I think he’s doing it wrong.
The villain of episode 3 was “C. Rynge”, a syringe that’s getting back at the bad rap that shots get by… making them hurt more? How does that even… whatever.

Clearly, they’re the paragons of evildoing, and not some throw-aways that’d be better off remaining in the dustbin of anime history!

All the while, Lime learns about human life, Bass does charmingly stupid things, and the audience just dies a little on the inside. Like so many other failed OVAs, the series ends abruptly with no resolution, leaving the viewer wondering what the hell the point of the series was, exactly.

Jewel BEM Hunter Lime’s sense of humor tends to be incredibly hit or miss. The show favors slapstick visual gags, perverted jokes, and interplay between Lime and Bass to deliver the laughs. The knockabout humor generally works well, with decently paced setups and satisfying punchlines. The rest of the show, though, tends to rely on the chemistry between Lime and Bass, which tends to fall flat more often than it succeeds.

With no plot resolution, a generally half-assed sense of humor, and generally boring characters, it really is a mystery as to why Media Blasters would license the series at all. Of course, this could be said of a lot of shows released by the company in this time frame. Back in the ’90s, they were notorious for tossing out two to three episode OVAs, and hoping that something would stick, which led to some truly “offbeat” releases like Ninja Cadets, Earthian, and the now-classic Shinesman. So, to call this a rare miss for the company would be a bit misleading. Instead, one could argue that it was par for the course at the time.

And you want me to watch this WHY?

Much like Cosplay Complex, Jewel BEM Hunter Lime is a series that will keep viewers sitting with the sheer hope that something salvageable will rise from the tasteless muck of the show’s bland characters and setting. The visual gags tend to work very well, and they’re placed at just the right moment that they’ll yank in viewers that start to fall off. The result is a short series that will bring about a few laughs and a lot of snark, that serves well as a good insert show.

When and how long should I screen this for?

Jewel BEM Hunter Lime should never, I repeat never be shown as a lead-off to an evening. It’s a weak show in this regard, that will cause viewers to start to tune out early. Instead, it works well as a filler, placed in the middle of the evening as a prelude to something more punchy like Protectors of Universe or Magnos The Robot. Since it’s not egregiously bad, this can safely be shown for an entire episode without inciting riots among your guests.