Niche

Chainsaw Man and Imposter Syndrome, You’re Better Than You Think You Are


Warning: Contains spoilers for Tatsuki Fujimoto’s Chainsaw Man.


At first glance, the Chainsaw Man manga appears to be a flurry of B-movie gore and juvenile character motivations. The opening chapter’s climax is an overt mashup of Night of the Living Dead and Texas Chainsaw Massacre, and lead character Denji’s primary motivation in the early story is to “touch some boobs.” He even goes as far as to get into a fight with a hulking bat monster and a grody leech devil in order to get to second base. These elements are fun and schlocky, and would make for an enjoyable experience on their own. Beyond this thin membrane of pulp, though, is a collection of potent and deeply affecting themes.

While Chainsaw Man explores concepts like the nature of personhood, and the value of platonic connections, none of these are dealt with as effectively as its exploration of imposter syndrome

Put simply, imposter syndrome is the feeling of unworthiness of your success or happiness, and overlaps a lot with general depression and feelings of low self-esteem.

Image from Chainsaw Man, which depicts a red-haired woman standing before a person with a monstrous chainsaw for a head.

The bulk of Chainsaw Man’s run sees Denji escaping abject, soul-crushing poverty to create a modest life for himself with friends, a career he excels in, and even a budding romance with his boss, Makima. He picks up hobbies like watching movies and learns he has an affinity for bad or misunderstood films. It’s a pretty standard life — outside of having to occasionally kill an eldritch horror or two — but Denji loves it after growing up without even his most basic needs being met.

By the start of Chapter 80, though, Denji is more depressed than he’s ever been. The cataclysmic Gun Devil possessed his older brother figure, Aki, and Denji had to kill him. He blames himself for Aki’s death, and hates that he couldn’t think of any way to save him. He begins to think that, if only he were a smarter, stronger, or even just a better person than he is, Aki would be alive, and their simple life could continue. This comes to a head as Denji is expressing his insecurity to Makima. He tells her that he would rather be her dog than deal with the problems and shortcomings that come with an autonomous life filled with different relationships.

In response, Makima agrees to make all of Denji’s decisions for him, then immediately murders Power, Denji’s best friend.

Over the next several chapters, Makima reveals that she was directly responsible for Denji’s happy life. He quickly internalizes that he did not earn his quaint existence or rewarding relationships, and Makima ensures that he no longer believes that he’s worthy of either. Indeed, this entire ordeal is revealed to be a plot by Makima to draw the Chainsaw Devil out from inside of Denji. The Chainsaw Devil, who shares the transformed Denji’s moniker of “Chainsaw Man,” is an immensely powerful entity, and the only known being who can completely destroy devils to the point that their very influence upon the world is erased. Many of the antagonists in the series sought out the Chainsaw Devil’s heart within Denji, and it’s clear that this devil is a major player in the mostly unseen politics of this world.

Makima, meanwhile, is infatuated with this version of Chainsaw Man and sees him as an  unknowable power; a chaotic force that even she, as the Control Devil, cannot readily manipulate to her will. All the while, the audience is well aware that the idea of Chainsaw Man that Makima has built up isn’t who this devil really is.

The real Chainsaw Man is, in fact, a dog.

The Chainsaw Devil is first introduced in the series as Pochita, the chainsaw-faced devil dog that Denji adopts as a child. We know from Pochita’s actions and his few lines of dialogue that he doesn’t care about being the entity that Makima and others believe he is. Instead, he appears to care solely about his relationship with Denji, and the young man’s wellbeing. In short, this slightly deformed kickball with a chainsaw coming out of his face, is more of a big softie than a chaotic killing machine.

This is where Chainsaw Man really starts to lay bare the truth of dealing with feelings of inadequacy. While the full devil Chainsaw Man is an established figure within the lore of the series, he’s also a metaphor for Denji’s insecurities. Denji and many other characters compare him to this invented idea of who Chainsaw Man is and how the figure should act. The person and standards Denji always falls short of aren’t real, meaning no one can live up to them.

Those affected by imposter syndrome often don’t feel bad because they’re failing to match a peer. Rather, the feelings of inadequacy stem from not doing as well as one thinks they should be. People create an idealized version of themselves, then feel bad when they can’t live up to that fiction. By painting a fuller picture of Chainsaw Man’s identity through Pochita’s words and actions and comparing them to Makima’s fangirlish interpretation of the character, the series  shows how toxic and harmful this mentality can be.

While accepting one’s shortcomings and failures is an important part of personal growth, it’s easy to get stuck in this step and begin to define yourself by these negative elements. With this in mind, it’s easy to think that you don’t deserve the good things and relationships that you do have in your life. The only real way out of this spiral is to rediscover your own self-worth, be it through yourself, or with the help of others, and pull yourself free.

Pages from the Chainsaw Man manga, depicting Denji as he talks with a government agent.

This forms an important bedrock for Denji’s major story arc. As Pochita is on the brink of death, he and Denji are saved from Makima by a briefly revived Power. Shortly after, Denji’s mentor, Kishibe, takes him and another implicated Devil Hunter, Kobeni, to a safe house. Like Denji, Kobeni is frustrated and rendered melancholic by her life. Still, she has enough of an understanding of her situation to realize that her own skittish nature and abusive family are the cause of most of her problems. She has a better understanding of herself and the world than Denji does, and realizes that her problems come from tangible sources rather than a perceived sense of inferiority.

In talking with Kobeni, Denji learns that living a pain and inconvenience-free life is impossible and that, no matter how he conducts himself or how low he sets his expectations, he can’t have a perfect life or be a perfect person. In turn, he decides to let himself be selfish and want more for himself besides the bare minimum. Denji realizes that, if he’s always going to be unhappy on some level, he can take a chance and shoot for more in his life.

The teen sees a news broadcast and discovers that people view his version of Chainsaw Man as a heroic figure, worthy of celebration. It is here that he decides that he wants to hold on to their admiration, and is willing to fight Makima in order to live his best life. He’s accepted that if he can’t avoid the worst in life by limiting his expectations, he’s going to allow himself to want more out of his existence.

It can be difficult for people with low self-esteem to feel that they deserve a better life, or even that they deserve to be happy. And, much like Denji’s journey, overcoming imposter syndrome requires acceptance of the fact that life is going to be filled with highs and lows, and that those peaks and valleys are both okay and fleeting. Failing and being sad about that doesn’t make you a worse person than anyone else, and aspiring to something greater doesn’t make you terrible. It’s all a part of being human.

In the midst of a depressive episode, though, it can be difficult to think that you deserve better. And, sadly, the fear of feeling worse or ending up in an even worse situation can be paralyzing. While this particular arc in Chainsaw Man can first seem like Denji is being selfish, or that he’s begun acting on base-level desires again, those who’ve been there can recognize that this is Denji realizing that he’s willing to be hurt to pursue the things that will make him happy. It’s beautiful, and Chainsaw Man is made all the better for depicting a difficult but formative moment in people’s lives that rarely appears in the pages of manga.

Image from the Chainsaw Man manga, which depicts Makima walking in front of a line of demonic entities.

In the series’ final chapters, he fights to pursue the life and happiness he previously thought was too good for him.

The symbolism in Denji’s final battle against Makima and her minions presents itself immediately. While the full devil Chainsaw Man was able to defeat Makima’s human-devil hybrids easily in previous chapters, Denji struggles to take them out. He takes heavy damage and is forced to use his powers more creatively than at any point beforehand to handle even one or two of the foes.

Ultimately, Denji achieves victory, and manages to defeat all of his foes by the skin of his teeth. In the process, he proves that, even if he’s not perfect, he can still accomplish incredible things and live up to the more grounded expectations he sets for himself. He’s not as powerful as the mythical Chainsaw Devil but, at the end of the day, he’s able to accomplish the same things as the invented standard Makima compares him to.

At the series’ climax, Denji manages to trick and defeat Makima, who is the most powerful entity in the series thus far. He’s able to do this because he has a genuine understanding of the Chainsaw Devil’s powers, denoting his actual closeness to the figure instead of Makima’s mistaken perception of the devil. Furthermore, she never really bothered to take the time to get to know Denji, and only saw him as a means to her own goals.

While Makima is presumed to be immortal, Denji takes it upon himself to literally consume her, the one who stoked and validated all of his insecurities to begin with. While this is a gory way to finish off a final villain in a manga, it’s also a representation of Denji’s acceptance of his shortcomings and acknowledgment of the parts of himself he hates the most. He literally embraces the person who bolstered his perceived inadequacies, and decides at the end that he’s still worthy of happiness.

A part of being a healthier and more complete person is accepting your faults and failures as a part of who you are. Sure, self improvement is great and a part of a rewarding life, but you also need to accept that you’re never going to be infallible. Even with these blemishes, you deserve to be happy and enjoy your life.

Still from the Chainsaw Man anime trailer, which depicts Denji, Power, and Hayakawa eating breakfast together.

Chainsaw Man is a whirlwind of action, gore, themes, and opinions, all of which come at a breakneck pace and seem to be deeply connected to the author. At its core, though, the series is about discovering and accepting yourself. It centers on figuring out who you are, what kind of relationships are meaningful to you and why, and deciding that you’re still worthy of happiness even if you fall short of some imagined ideal.

While plenty of manga see their leads confront their insecurities and grow stronger from the experience, it’s rare to see a series so frankly depict a person’s journey as they learn that they’re allowed to want more out of life. Rather than focusing on someone earnestly pursuing their goals, Chainsaw Man sees Denji learn to like himself and that he shouldn’t feel bad for not meeting others’ false expectations. It presents answers to difficult, often uncomfortable questions that not everyone can relate to, with a willingness to focus on personal resolutions that help Denji’s journey feel like few others in recent memory.

About the author

Lucas DeRuyter

Lucas DeRuyter is an entertainment writer that focuses on anime/manga, video games, television, film, and whatever else he thinks is cool. He's written for more places than he can remember, but you can keep up with all of his writing by following him on Twitter. He also hosts and produces the Voluntary Viewing podcast, which definitely isn't just an excuse for him to stay in touch with his college friends. He sincerely hopes you're having a great day, and thanks you for checking out his work.

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